How to Argue with Kid Gloves!

Are you worried that you aren’t feeling close to your spouse/partner again?

 I hear you!


 You’ve always wanted a great relationship/marriage but you’ve been feeling more alone than ever in your relationship because the two of you have drifted apart. Lately, you’re talking less to each other and that’s making you more anxious and afraid that your communication issues in the relationship are too big and that it could mean you’re headed for breaking up or divorce. That thought makes you even more anxious because you’d always wanted a relationship where you’d be as close to each other 50 years from now as you were when you first got together. Instead, you’ve been fighting more often, even saying mean things to each other. Afterwards, it’s tense for the next few days before you start talking again but you know there’ll be another fight 


Maybe you’ve even had couples counseling in the past where the last therapist listened and suggested a few ideas of what the two of you could try when upset, but you couldn’t remember what you’d learned so nothing changed while arguing. You’d try counseling again because you want to stay together but don’t want it to fail because staying together is important. You just want a peaceful home where the two of you are close and can then be great parents for your current or future kids. 


Now the cold, hard truth. There’s a serious lack of teaching around healthy communication and then being able to disagree respectfully in our world. I’ve been a therapist for the last 25 years and I can count on one hand the number of people who’d grown up in a home where people argued in a healthy way. Emotional awareness and being able to talk respectfully when disagreeing isn’t natural or instinctual! It’s not an “either you have it or you don’t,” thing. It’s a practiced superpower! 


Fortunately, you’ve landed in the right place! My training helps you and your partner learn and then remember to use the skills needed in the heat of the moment, making it easier for you to be calm, focused, and respectful, even when you aren’t agreeing! The bonus is that these same techniques also apply to parenting, then helping you have those close bonds with your kids! The time you invest in learning these communication skills benefits everyone in your home! When you know how to manage arguments in healthy ways, your kids are experiencing the effect of healthy communication which makes it way less likely they’ll make unhealthy relationship choices! It’s a win for your family:)


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